When you spot an attractive man or woman, your eyes don’t fly out of your head like they always do in cartoons. However, there are really specific, physical cues that reveal your desire, even if the other person doesn’t realize it.

The brain is to blame for most of these reactions, but instead of panicking about masking your lust, use this knowledge to identify lust in others. Here are some of the top physiological signs of lustful desire.

Dilated pupils

The eyes might be a window to the soul, but they’re also a window to your lustful desires. Don’t put on your bug-eyed sunglasses just yet. Most people don’t know these cues, and hey, now you can figure out who’s into you just by studying their eyes, which you’re conveniently supposed to look at anyway!

Your pupils dilate when it’s dark and when you’re looking at something you like. That’s why this physical reaction is linked to sexual attraction, but it’s not limited to just sexual longing. So if your significant other’s pupils are larger when they’re staring at a cake, I wouldn’t get too alarmed.

Fun fact: Because it’s easier to identify pupil dilation when you have lighter-colored eyes, that might be why people generally find blue and green eyes the most attractive. If you have blue or green eyes, you’re more obvious about your feelings of attraction. You can decide if that’s a good or bad thing.

Heart racing/pounding

This has to be the most cliché indication of love:

Boy, you got my heartbeat running away…” – Nicki Minaj’s “Super Bass”

Do I make your heart beat like an 808 drum?” – Ke$ha’s “Your Love Is My Drug”

If I said my heart was beating loud…” – Britney Spears’s “Hold It Against Me”

And that’s just with bad pop songs on the radio. Don’t even get us started on movies, TV shows, books, and every song every made before 2010. The beating heart is the ultimate representation of lust, love, and longing. But why? Other than the fact that it deals with the heart, what about lust makes this tiny organ beat so rapidly?

When you find someone attractive, your brain sends a message to your adrenal glands to start producing chemicals like adrenaline — you know, the same stuff that surges through you when you’re freaking out and able to lift a car off someone. It totally amps you. No wonder your heart beats faster.

Sweating

Unlike a racing heart and dilated eyes, sweaty palms are a little more noticeable and a little more embarrassing. Sweating is one of the most obvious outward signs of attraction. That doesn’t mean you can shove your crush into a sauna to get the desired attraction results, though.

To tell if someone’s attracted to you, just pay attention to when they sweat (if they do). If you’re in a super well air-conditioned room eating frozen yogurt and watching Ice Age, and the person is sweating, that’s probably a good sign for you!

Adrenaline causes sweating just like it causes your heart to pound when you’re attracted to someone. Your brain signals the release of other chemicals when you’re feeling attraction, too, and the mix of all these chemicals produces the excitement (and the sweating). Two examples are dopamine and norepinephrine (which is similar to adrenaline). Basically, the brain has a field day.

Different breathing patterns

This chemical craziness doesn’t stop there. Dopamine, one of the major players in creating infatuation, is partly responsible for making you feel like you can’t breathe. Because that’s what you need — the panic of having quicker breaths, a faster heart rate, and sweat dripping out of every pore.

Then you bring in phenylethylamine (which is found in chocolate), another brain-released stimulate that plays a part and also might prompt the further release of the previously mentioned chemicals. All of these stimulants mixed together makes for a slew of physical reactions.

Once this natural brain rave is going on throughout your body, your breathing might quicken. You can also identify this quality in someone you think might be attracted to you. As long as you’re not running a marathon, this is a pretty accurate sign. Keep in mind, though, that not everyone is super obviously about their shorter breaths, so don’t get too discouraged if you don’t see the cues.

Conclusion

Our brain triggers the release of a lot of chemicals when we’re feeling attraction, which causes a variety of physical responses. The main signs are listed above, but there are others as well, like energy boosts, increased focus, and that fun “love” feeling, which usually tags along, unless you’re looking for a one-night stand.

Sources
http://articles.cnn.com/2010-02-12/health/love.heart.brain_1_heart-rate-stress-hormone-romantic-love?_s=PM:HEALTH
http://www.healthberth.com/2011/09/what-happens-in-your-body-when-you-fall.html
http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200706/ten-politically-incorrect-truths-about-human-nature
http://www.bbwmagazine.com/love_3_0016.htm
http://health.msn.com/health-topics/sexual-health/womens-sexual-health/your-body-on-lust
http://people.howstuffworks.com/love6.htm
http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200909/the-plunge-pleasure
http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-phenylethylamine.htm
http://www.alovingspace.com/pages/pract8.php

Click here to leave a comment

Dating is a constant dance, both between two potential lovers and between what was normal and what is today. Every generation can look back condescendingly on their parents and forward disgusted at their children. There may not be any ironclad rules or unfairness in love and dating, but this generation definitely has its own social mores.

Technology definitely plays a role, and the open and fast-paced nature of modern life makes changes quick and people honest. The old rules just don’t apply like they used to. Let’s discuss some of the more common practices that have become normal over the past few years.

Clothes Still Make the Man

No matter what the modern world may say about gender equality, men are still judged on their status symbols. No matter what a woman may say about how appearances don’t matter, a man who shows up looking slovenly is going home by himself. Even sideburns, a good haircut and clothes that look lived in but not homeless are the basics a man needs to live up to.

If you want to look above average, you need to spend a little more and get very creative. Perception is reality, and if you dress “average” that’s exactly how you’ll be treated.

Online Dating is Huge

One in five singles has gone online looking for dates. China leads the world with 140 million online daters, and Japan was the first country to release a smart phone app to help singles meet each other out and about. The world is full of people sitting in front of computers, and if not for online dating our species might not be able to breed anymore.

When you consider that the average length of courtship is 42 months when a couple meets offline and less than 19 months when they meet online, the raw efficiency of meeting your mate online becomes clear.

Virtual Intimacy Is the Norm

People today are more comfortable in front of their web cams than any generation has ever been before. People will post nearly nude pictures of themselves for the entire world to see, and text pictures to their friends of them doing lascivious things without any inhibition at all. But that isn’t the only way intimacy has soaked into the virtual world.

Often a woman will become close to what a man through e-mailing and chatting with him online. This virtual intimacy will cause her to sleep with him, even unprotected, very early in their relationship. Unfortunately, this connection is often an illusion with nothing to back it up in real life.

Dating Ages Are Based on Gender Perceptions

Often, a girl will date men five to ten years older than she is because females are perceived to be more mature than males. However, they will turn around and criticize a man who dates women substantially younger than he is. Men have to either take this criticism on the chin and ignore it or seriously limit their dating prospects by age range.

Chivalry Is Alive and Well

Women are used to men who consider them equals in everything. Women have good jobs, start great businesses and buy homes without any man’s help. However, a lot of women still hold out the fantasy that a man will open the door for them, walk them home without expecting to be let in, and pay for the majority of their dates. Call it sexist or old-fashioned, but men are expected to get out of the frat boy mentality at some point.

There Is Required Reading for Dates

These days there are some things you need to know to seem like you haven’t been studying the underside of a rock. First off, you need to get the culture. If a celebrity did something especially interesting last week, you should have at least heard about it. You don’t have to tweet or follow Twitter, but you need to know how it works.

In most cities, being a dater means having some knowledge of the local indie band scene. Not knowing things like that means you’re too mainstream or that you just don’t get the culture. Rather like knowing what looks good in clothing and hair, understanding the current events and celebrity landscape means you pass the test of paying attention to and being part of the world at large. There’s only one acceptable answer to, “Are you on Facebook?”

Taking Home the Point

If you want to date nowadays, some rules are perennial. You need to take good care of yourself, you need to be connected to the rest of the world, and you need to understand that chivalry is great. Be strong, don’t be afraid to date women of any age group that interests you — as long as they’re legal — and you’ll be fine.

Images
http://www.esquire.com/cm/esquire/images/best-dressed-intro-0908-lg.jpg
http://www.linain.com/wp-content/uploads/online-dating-women.jpg
http://www.exgirlfriendguruexposed.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/online_dating_tips_for_women.jpg
http://asset-server.libsyn.com/item/812312/assets/older-man-younger-woman.jpg
http://library.thinkquest.org/10949/images/suit.jpg
http://thehealthylivinglounge.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/reading-a-book.jpg

Sources
http://www.funhold.com/2010/12/13-dating-rules-for-men-2011.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Courtship
http://ask.metafilter.com/72471/The-Lowdown-Online-Dating-Etiquette
http://hipsterjew.com/2011/08/10/social-dating-norms-for-18-23-year-olds/
http://onlinedatingservicestatistics.blogspot.com/

Click here to leave a comment

Shocking Proposals That Ended in YES!

October 20, 2011

Proposing marriage is a risky business. For starters, she might just say no, especially if you go overboard and forget to make this a private moment or try to get too fancy with it. For another thing, making your proposal too complicated can actually hurt your potential bride, such as if you try to put [...]

Vollsändigen Artikel lesen →

Dating in the Olden Times: How Modern Men Date

October 5, 2011

Throughout history, men and women have faced the traditional need to find love and fill their homes with the children and wealth that can best be produced by a great marriage. At the very least the marriage should look great in public. Needless to say, deciding who you should marry is a major choice and [...]

Vollsändigen Artikel lesen →

Dating in the Olden Times: How 20th Century Men Courted

September 15, 2011

Throughout history, men and women have faced the traditional need to find love and fill their homes with the children and wealth that can best be produced by a great marriage. At the very least the marriage should look great in public. Needless to say, deciding who you should marry is a major choice and [...]

Vollsändigen Artikel lesen →

Dating in the Olden Times: How Victorian Men Courted

September 8, 2011

Throughout history, men and women have faced the traditional need to find love and fill their homes with the children and wealth that can best be produced by a great marriage. At the very least the marriage should look great in public. Needless to say, deciding who you should marry is a major choice and [...]

Vollsändigen Artikel lesen →

Dating in the Olden Times: How Renaissance Men Courted

August 30, 2011

Throughout history, men and women have faced the traditional need to find love and fill their homes with the children and wealth that can best be produced by a great marriage. At the very least the marriage should look great in public. Needless to say, deciding who you should marry is a major choice and [...]

Vollsändigen Artikel lesen →

54 Facts About Dating, Sex, & Romance

August 24, 2011

Sex, dating and romance are funny things. For most of us, they carry a lot of mystery, as we struggle with why the opposite sex does what they do, and how great the differences are between men and women. While we’ll probably never know anywhere near everything about these sweet mysteries of life, the following [...]

Vollsändigen Artikel lesen →

6 Things You Can Learn from Celebrity Couple

August 16, 2011

People look up to the stars (no, not those stars) for entertainment, inspiration and knowledge. Apart from being cultural and fashion trendsetters, celebrities provide the public with many valuable life lessons—including what to do, and what not to do. It can be assumed Oprah, for example, will have her very own book in the New [...]

Vollsändigen Artikel lesen →

Why to Avoid the Girl With “Crazy Eyes”

August 1, 2011

Every man knows not to date a crazy woman (and vice-versa). While the chances of her doing something really entertaining are very high, there’s also too much of a chance she’ll end up doing something horrible. It’s all fun and games when she’s taking up manhole covers and arranging them into smiley faces outside your [...]

Vollsändigen Artikel lesen →